Friday, November 20, 2009

Thanks Larry

For a person of somewhat diminutive stature, he had always seemed so strong and vital. Yet here he was right in front of me: weak, tired, swollen in some places and completely emaciated in others. If Richard hadn't have warned me, I probably would have gasped in shock when I saw him. His formerly strong jawline was gone. The small, well kept mustache seemed like a great bristle brush of blonde hair set on the front of his now gaunt face.

We talked for a bit and there were only moments of the man I knew, until we went out back so he could smoke. Some people remark that smoking is what killed him so why keep doing it? Well, smoking had already killed him, so why take away one of the few things he could still enjoy at that point?

For those ten to fifteen minutes in his backyard, he was the same old Larry. Quickest wit I had ever known. His voice slightly above a rasp, but his tongue as sharp as ever. He laughed and joked and was the butt of jokes with equal ease. We had agreed over the years, that there was really nothing that couldn't be made fun of in the right group of friends. When your friend is dying before your eyes though, well you do edit yourself a bit. Honestly, I think he would have found some of the more dark and morbid things that came to my mind pretty funny.

We moved back inside and the effort of interaction and moving around had obviously taken it's toll. I remarked to Richard after a few quiet minutes that I thought Larry had fallen asleep. As his wife warned us he might.

"Nope. I'm still with you." said Larry. "They think I'm always falling asleep. The truth is that I'm just real selective about what I respond to. Given my current level of energy."

"So when they think you're asleep you're listening to everything that's being said?"

That same old broad grin stretched across his face, making him look almost himself again.

"Yep, I sure am."

At my darkest moments, talking with Larry always cheered me up. He never really said anything overly nice or supportive, but we always laughed. Always. I never hung up after talking to Larry with a frown. Until the day he told me he had cancer. Now when things are tough, I just try to imagine what he would say...and I still end up smiling.

Thanks Larry.

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